A Thankful Announcement

You guys. YOU GUYS!! I barely have words.

And I am a writer.

I apologize for my recent absence, I have been distracted. I have been floating about 12 feet above the ground, trying to make sense of some amazing news, all while battling debilitating sickness.

Morning sickness.

WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!!

Let me catch my breath and I will share the story.

Ok, here it goes. As you know, we have had our share of struggles and losses. After years of trying, we decided it was in the best interest of our family and our collective sanity, to stop trying to have another child. We mourned the baby that would never be and eventually found ourselves coming to terms with what our family was to look like.

One child had it's advantages and we were happy. Isn't that ultimately the goal? Happiness. For us it was and the thought of anymore losses and heartbreaks was unbearable. We had been blessed with a happy, healthy, amazing little girl. We were happy.

By the end of February, I started feeling different. Slightly nauseous and extremely tired. Could it be? Could I be? The test took no time in confirming what I both hoped for and feared. I was pregnant.

This time was different though. My symptoms were intense. Much more so than with any of the pregnancies I had lost. The day of my 7 week ultrasound came. All we need was a heartbeat. There was so much hope in that tiny flicker. I could hear my husband exhale when our smiling doctor said, "There you go! See that? That is a healthy heart."

We were to come back in a month for another scan, to make sure our itty bitty baby was growing.

I held my breath for the next 4 weeks.

And grow s/he did. We have a wriggly baby with arms, legs, spine, and that glorious heartbeat. Hearing that thumping was indescribable.

So here we are. I am finishing up the first trimester. Still nauseous but I find comfort in knowing that it will lead me to our baby. A baby we never expected to happen. A baby we ached for. A baby our daughter has begged us for. A baby that is loved so much already.

*You may only see a grey blob but I see a future that we had given up on. (Baby is looking down, spine along the top, head to the right, chin to chest, star over face to protect their fetal identity, of course.)*